Fauci: new federal ‘Jumbo’, XXX size anal swabs approved for TSA airport use
WASHINGTON, DC—Airline travel will be much safer with the use of the new Omicron, XXX anal swabs being utilized by...
Dr. Anthony Fauci
POLL: What color should Anthony Fauci’s prison jumpsuit be?
We at Genesius Times want to make sure Dr. Fauci looks great while he's in jail for mass murder, so...
BREAKING: Omicron surpasses Alec Baldwin in leading causes of death in US
US—The Center for Disease Control and Promotion (CDC) reported today that the COVID Omicron variant has surpassed Alec Baldwin in...
Fauci now recommends face masks over your eyes so you can’t read his leaked emails
WASHINGTON, DC—A treasure trove of emails from National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases (NIAID) Director Dr. Anthony Fauci’s were...
Fauci releases new book: ‘Everything I Don’t Like is Medical Misinformation’
WASHINGTON, DC—It seemed that Dr. Anthony Fauci was on the ropes in the latest exchange between Dr. Rand Paul and...
Justice Sotomayor ‘pretty sure’ Omicron has killed every American already
WASHINGTON, DC—Arguable the most intelligent Supreme Court Justice if not most intelligent person in the world, Sonia Sotomayor was disappointed...
Fauci ‘feeling fine’ after latest booster
WASHINGTON, DC—America's Doctor, Dr. Anthony Fauci, says he's "feeling fine" following the latest COVID booster shot, which involves dozens of...
CDC releases new ‘mood ring’ that tells what COVID variant you have
ATLANTA—The US Centers for Disease Control and Promotion (CDC) are experts at science and all the science-y things. They come...
Generous Americans donate their vaccines to undocumented immigrants
US—Millions of generous Americans are forgoing their COVID vaccines to make sure that the millions of undocumented immigrants pouring in...
Fauci cancels Christmas so he won’t have to go back to North Pole to make toys
WASHINGTON, DC—Chief medical adviser to US President* Joe Biden, diminutive Dr. Anthony Fauci has decided to cancel Christmas this year...
