In response to Russian attack, Biden imposes several new sanctions on American citizens
WASHINGTON, DC—Following the further attack by Russia on Ukraine, the Biden administration announced new sanctions on American citizens, ensuring further...
Russia
US ‘very worried’ Russia may seize US bioweapons labs in Ukraine that don’t exist
WASHINGTON, DC—Government officials are "very worried" that Russia may seize US bioweapons labs in Ukraine that don't exist. "Do we...
Biden bans buying oil from Russia; mandates buying Russian oil from China marked up 10%
WASHINGTON, DC—US President* Joe Biden announced Tuesday the U.S. will ban all oil imports from Russia and require imports of...
Putin opens Uyghur concentration camp to make everyone like him again
MOSCOW—After receiving widespread condemnation for his invasion of Ukraine, Russian President Vladimir Putin has opened up Russia's very own Uyghur...
BREAKING: Florida invades Ukraine so that CNN will leave them too
TALLAHASSEE—The state of Florida has invaded the sovereign nation of Ukraine so that CNN will leave them too. Florida also...
Hunter Biden promises to return his 2 Russian mail-order brides amidst sanctions
WASHINGTON, DC—President* Biden's son Hunter promised to return his Russian mail-order brides amidst his father's sanctions on the country. "I...
Top Ten least funniest things in a Ukraine – Russian war
Top Ten least funniest things in the Ukraine - Russian war10. Orders coming from Russian headquarters are inside smaller orders...
BREAKING: Ukraine confirms Greta Thunberg is the ‘Ghost of Kiev’
KYIV—The elusive 'Ghost of Kyiv,' who has inspired the globe in his remarkable ability to shoot down Russians, has been...
BREAKING: AOC says she was ‘nearly raped’ in Ukraine invasion
WASHINGTON, DC–Over a year after the War of January 6th, US Representative Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (D-NY) has issued a statement that...
BREAKING: Heavily armed Russians arrest peaceful Ukrainian protesters at gun point
KYIV—Video and photographic evidence have shown Russians beating and trampling peaceful Ukrainian protesters at gun point. Sources also say that...
