Biden releases his 1924 New Year’s resolutions
President Biden has just released his 1924 New Year’s resolutions at a press conference today in Washington, DC. “Yes, here...
Month: December 2023
Zelensky Asks Biden To Select Tip Amount On Latest Billion Dollar Aid Package
In a diplomatic twist that left pundits scratching their heads, Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelensky has reached out to U.S. President...
Chicago Mayor Brandon Johnson Auditions for Angry Birds
CHICAGO—Mayor Brandon Johnson recently stepped into the world of mobile gaming, leaving behind the political battlegrounds of the Windy City...
BREAKING: Maine Secretary of State saves democracy by making sure people can’t vote for their favorite candidate in 2024
AUGUSTA, ME—In a bold move to save democracy, Maine Secretary of State Shenna Bellows has unveiled a revolutionary plan to...
John Miller emerges as GOP front runner in Colorado
DENVER- Following the removal of Donald Trump from the election ballot, newcomer John Miller finds himself the leading GOP candidate."We're...
On this day in 1993, Harvard President Claudine Gay wrote the songs All I Want For Christmas Is You, Silent Night, Jingle Bell Rock, and Panama
BOSTON—Harvard President Claudine Gay is not just an esteemed scholar but also the clandestine creative genius behind some of the...
BREAKING: Colorado Supreme Court defends democracy by making sure people can only vote for Biden in 2024
DENVER—To achieve this noble goal, they've implemented a groundbreaking measure: allowing voters to cast their ballots for only one candidate....
Chicago Mayor to Texas Gov: ‘How dare you send illegals to my city that openly welcomes them!’
CHICAGO—Mayor Brandon Johnson has issued a stern rebuke to Texas Governor Greg Abbott for sending "dirty immigrants" to his city,...
Biden wishes millions of Americans a ‘season of illness and death’ in his annual holiday card
WASHINGTON, DC—President* Joe Biden and his wife, Doctor* Jill Biden want to wish every unvaccinated American a "wonderful, cheery and...
Graham “There is NO Biden Bribery Evidence but There IS a Santa Claus!”
WASHINGTON, DC—Senator Lindsey Graham has embarked on a metamorphic journey that has left constituents scratching their heads and likening him...
