Year: 2026

France To Advise Iran On How To Surrender With Dignity

Robert L. Peters, Jr. March 23, 2026 0

Paris, France — In a bold diplomatic initiative that has left international observers alternately baffled and unsurprised, President Emmanuel Macron...

Mamdani Builds $12 Billion ‘Wealth Containment Wall’ Around NYC to Stop Taxpayers From Leaving

Exavier Saskagoochie March 21, 2026 0

NEW YORK — In an emergency mayoral address broadcast from the steps of Gracie Mansion—flanked by a newly installed bronze...

Trump Appoints Afroman Chief Negotiator in Iran Conflict to Deploy Custom Diss Tracks in Bid to Force Regime Surrender

Exavier Saskagoochie March 20, 2026 0

WASHINGTON, DC—In a personnel decision described by White House officials as “unconventional but tremendously effective,” President Donald Trump today appointed...

Women Too Stupid To Get I.D. Relieved To Not Have To Vote Anymore

Robert L. Peters, Jr. March 20, 2026 0

In a stunning development hailed as both liberating and patriotic, millions of American women have reportedly been freed from the...

Local Trump Voter Surprisingly Okay with Him Doing the Opposite of Everything He Voted For

Googly McMooglyface March 17, 2026 0

SPRINGFIELD, USA — Area resident and longtime Trump supporter Dale “Big Truck” Hargrove expressed complete equanimity today upon learning that...

‘$3 Gas is Outrageous!’ Says Woman Happy To Pay $5 Under Biden

Robert L. Peters, Jr. March 17, 2026 0

Local resident Cora Upshin, a dedicated Democrat and self-described "principled consumer," took to X this week to voice her profound...

AOC congratulates Cuba on achieving Net Zero with recent blackouts

Exavier Saskagoochie March 16, 2026 0

In a groundbreaking development hailed by progressive climate advocates, Representative Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (D-NY) today issued a statement congratulating the Republic...