Exavier Saskagoochie

Exavier is an excellent writer—tremendous. He's really very, very talented. And his hair is really great too. He should have a couple Pulitzers under his belt by now if there was any justice. If he brightened your day at all please consider tipping a coffee or a leg of mutton through this link!

CDC says you can now peak your head out from your self-imposed prison once a day

Exavier Saskagoochie April 27, 2021

NEW YORK (AP) — The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) said Tuesday that you can finally peak your...

Bill Gates wins Oscar for best villain in real life

Exavier Saskagoochie April 26, 2021

HOLLYWOOD—The 93rd Academy Awards broke a lot of new ground this year including awards for best real-life villain, which went...

Minneapolis PD to start arresting random white people in reparations for George Floyd murder

Exavier Saskagoochie April 22, 2021

MINNEAPOLIS—As part of the Derek Chauvin conviction for murdering George Floyd, the Minneapolis Police Department has been ordered to start...

BREAKING: Thin Blue Line supporters loot Walmart after Derek Chauvin conviction

Exavier Saskagoochie April 20, 2021

MINNEAPOLIS–Racist supporters Thin Blue Line supporters descended on a local Walmart to loot, pillage, and "burn the motherf****r down" in protest...

FBI is seeking information related to the insurrectionist pictured here

Exavier Saskagoochie April 20, 2021

The FBI is seeking information that will assist in identifying the person pictured above who is actively instigating violence across...

UPS commits to burning half of your packages if Derek Chauvin is acquitted

Exavier Saskagoochie April 20, 2021

ATLANTA—UPS has increased the stakes in the woke corporation olympics. The package "delivery" service has committed to burning half of...

Minnesota 2021 spring Riot Season set to open this week

Exavier Saskagoochie April 19, 2021

MINNEAPOLIS—Minnesota's 2021 spring Riot Season is set to open in most areas of the state this week. Looters and rioters...

BREAKING: Fox News projects Hunter Biden to win the Pulitzer for stupid memoir

Exavier Saskagoochie April 16, 2021

DOOSHE, DE--Hunter Biden's heavily-promoted sex- and drug-filled memoir "Beautiful Things" has tanked in its first week on bookshelves, selling only...