Liberal projectile tears found to be the source of water on the moon
For hundreds of years, researchers and explorers have failed to find evidence of water on the Moon. But just recently...
Exavier Saskagoochie
Exavier is an excellent writer—tremendous. He's really very, very talented. And his hair is really great too. He should have a couple Pulitzers under his belt by now if there was any justice. If he brightened your day at all please consider tipping a coffee or a leg of mutton through this link!
BREAKING: Trump cancels Global Warming in latest executive order
THE SOUTH—In a move that has stunned scientists and political observers alike, President Donald Trump, one day after his inauguration,...
BREAKING: Millions of women report for handmaid duty following Trump inauguration
US—The federal government have instructed millions of women across the country to report for "handmaid duty" following Donald Trump's stunning...
BREAKING: 8 inches of global warming dumped on South Louisiana
In what can only be described as Mother Nature's twisted sense of humor, South Louisiana woke up this morning to...
BREAKING: World stunned to hear a US president form complete sentences for the first time in 4 years
WASHINGTON, DC—In an astonishing turn of events, the global community was taken aback as the newly inaugurated President of the...
BREAKING: Trump finishes insurrection started 4 years ago by becoming president again
WASHINGTON, DC—In a plot twist that would have even the most seasoned Hollywood screenwriter scratching their head, Donald J. Trump...
BREAKING: AOC claims she was nearly raped by Trump’s inauguration ceremony
WASHINGTON, DC—Representative Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (D-NY) has made the audacious claim that she was nearly raped by Donald Trump's 2025 inauguration...
BREAKING: Biden pardons all criminals except cute old grandma who waved flag in Capitol Jan 6
WASHINGTON, DC—President* Joe Biden has issued an executive order pardoning all federal criminals and transferring their collective sentences to an...
BREAKING: Trump selects Genesius Times to replace CNN as official White House Fake News provider
WASHINGTON, DC—Donald Trump has announced that the Genesius Times will replace CNN as the official White House Fake News provider....
Trump Hollywood Envoy’s replaces fire-damaged Hollywood sign with “Trump Won”
HOLLYWOOD—In a bold and highly controversial move, Donald Trump's newly appointed Hollywood envoy, consisting of Mel Gibson, Jon Voight, and...
