Exavier Saskagoochie

Exavier is an excellent writer—tremendous. He's really very, very talented. And his hair is really great too. He should have a couple Pulitzers under his belt by now if there was any justice. If he brightened your day at all please consider tipping a coffee or a leg of mutton through this link!

Woke Nike Execs Hold Screaming Session to Determine Why Their Stock is Plummeting

Exavier Saskagoochie September 7, 2026 0

BEAVERTON, Ore. — A group of Nike executives left campus Monday for a wooded offsite, wearing coordinated yoga pants, to...

Trump Renames Labor Day ‘Capital Day,’ Says Without Capital, Labor is Just Slavery

Exavier Saskagoochie September 7, 2026 0

WASHINGTON — President Donald Trump announced early Monday that Labor Day would henceforth be known as Capital Day, a change...

Trump Says Reports of New Hairdo Are a Hoax

Exavier Saskagoochie September 6, 2026 0

WEST PALM BEACH, Fla. — President Donald Trump said Sunday that Americans who believe he has changed his hair —...

AOC Picks Lindsay Clancy as 2028 Presidential Running Mate

Exavier Saskagoochie September 5, 2026 0

QUEENS — Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez named Lindsay Clancy her 2028 running mate on Saturday and unveiled a slogan aides said...

Lone Lindsay Clancy Jury Holdout Seen Leaving Courthouse After Trial

Exavier Saskagoochie September 4, 2026 0

PLYMOUTH, Mass. — The Lindsay Clancy murder trial ended Friday in a mistrial after one juror declined to join the...

Harvey Weinstein Released After Changing Plea to Guilty by Reason of Hormones

Exavier Saskagoochie September 3, 2026 0

NEW YORK — Sexual Assault convict Harvey Weinstein was released from custody Thursday after a court accepted a revised plea...

BREAKING: Derek Chauvin Comes Out as Postpartum Woman and Hormones Made Him Do It; All Charges Vacated

Exavier Saskagoochie September 3, 2026 0

MINNEAPOLIS — Derek Chauvin announced Thursday that he is a postpartum woman and that he mystically gave birth to George...

Clancy Jury Still Deadlocked After Women Jurors Spend Four Days to Decide Where to Go for Lunch

Exavier Saskagoochie September 2, 2026 0

PLYMOUTH, Mass. — Important things. The jury in the Lindsay Clancy murder trial returned to court Wednesday still unable to...

BREAKING: Trump Drops Several Tactical Memes Over Canada After PM Carney’s Warning

Exavier Saskagoochie September 1, 2026 0

OTTAWA—President Trump has dropped several tactical memes over Canada after Prime Minister Mark Carney prohibited American political imagery, administration officials...