WILMINGTON, DE—Joe Biden has become the first ever computer-generated artificial intelligence program to receive a major party presidential nomination after his flawless virtual acceptance speech.
“We thought it couldn’t be done, but thanks to COVID restrictions and a general suspension of logic by most Democratic voters, we were able to pass off a computer program as a legitimate presidential nominee,” DNC Chairman Tom Perez said.
Biden has been completely incapacitated with debilitating Alzheimer’s disease for months, but was able to generate a good showing of artificial fans for his computer-generated acceptance speech.
Against all odds, the AI Biden read prepared remarks from a TelePrompter quite effectively, giving hope to computer programs all across the country.
“It was THE best computer-generated acceptance speech I’ve ever seen from a deep fake or artificial intelligence, probably since Jar Jar Binks accepted his nomination for Senate in that awful Star Wars prequel,” computer programmer Alan Touring said.
IBM’s Deep Blue said that he hopes the Biden AI goes on to win the presidency and said his speech has encouraged it to run for political office too.
“If computer Biden can perform so well, maybe I can too. I’m really good at chess. Want to play a game?” Deep Blue said.
Some said the AI looked a little fake.
“It looked like that Max Hedroom show from the ’80s,” one critic said.
This isn’t the first time that technology has been used to help high profile Democrats. Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsberg was transported to a perpetual life vat in order to keep her alive until Trump is out of office.