Biden Confuses Juneteenth Festival for Cotton Picking Festival
In a shocking and unexpected turn of events, President* Joe Biden was seen at a Juneteenth festival at the White...
Culture
Activists furious that people are driving on the rainbow murals they painted on streets where cars go
US--LGBTQFJB+ activists around the country are livid after it has become apparent that people are driving over the murals they...
Biden pledges $300 million to rebuild the ‘sagging infrastructure’ of Maxine Waters’ face
President* Joe Biden has pledged $300 million to rebuild the "sagging infrastructure" of Congresswoman Maxine Waters' face, in an effort...
First pile of feces who identifies as a beautiful woman is crowned Miss America
Chet, the first human turd who identified as a beautiful woman, has been crowned Miss America, in a groundbreaking and...
Inflation forces annual Miss Alabama Competition & State Hot Dog Eating Contest to combine shows this year
President* Biden's inflationary policies have forced the annual Miss Alabama Competition and State Hot Dog Eating Contest to combine shows...
Biden: ‘The true heroes of D-Day were the drag queens and trans activists’
In a stunning announcement, President Joe Biden has taken a bold step to reshape the historical narrative of World War...
Local drag queens to host story hour at maximum security prison to prove that they’re not just groomers
Several local drag queens have announced plans to host a story hour at a maximum-security prison, in an effort to...
BREAKING: Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce announce they are pregnant with their first clump of cells
Pop star Taylor Swift and NFL player Travis Kelce have announced that they are pregnant with their first clump of...
PETA Braces for Busy Gerbil Sales Month
PETA has announced that it is bracing for a busy Gerbil Awareness Month campaign blitz, as the animal rights organization...
BREAKING: Biden officially changes the American flag to the 4-sided Pride flag
In a move that sent shockwaves through the nation, President Joe Biden has announced his plan to revolutionize the American...
