BREAKING: White House Christmas tree falls down to be closer to Joe Biden
WASHINGTON, DC—In a heartwarming display of holiday spirit, the White House Christmas tree took a graceful tumble, making a bold...
Religion
BREAKING: Pope Francis ousts bishop for being ‘too Catholic’
VATICAN CITY—In a shocking turn of events at the Vatican, Pope Francis, known for his progressive stances and inclusive approach,...
AOC: ‘It is barbaric and evil to behead babies like Hamas did outside the mother’s womb!’
I don't know who needs to hear this, but what Hamas did in Israel is just barbaric and evil! How...
Newsom celebrates Indigenous Peoples’ Day by sacrificing 666 people to climate goddess Greta
SACRAMENTO—California Governor Gavin Newsom will be celebrating Indigenous Peoples' Day at the capitol by sacrificing six unlucky human beings to...
Sacrifice a human and 7 more ways to celebrate Indigenous Peoples’ Day
Everyone knows that if you celebrate Columbus Day, you’re a Nazi bigot, so that’s why most woke cultures and municipalities...
BREAKING: G-D Will Destroy Portland If He Can’t Find Ten Righteous People In The City
HEAVEN—Heavenly sources confirmed that the city of Portland is in mortal danger. If G-D cannot find ten righteous people in...
Thousands of US companies celebrating Noahic covenant in June
US—In a show of solidarity for biblical principles and in particular the traditional nuclear family, thousands of companies across the...
NHL announces Baptist Pride jerseys in the interest of ‘diversity and inclusion’
In a stunning move towards diversity and inclusion, the National Hockey League (NHL) has announced the introduction of Baptist Pride...
Biden orders all creepy Easter Bunnies to be replaced with himself
WASHINGTON, DC—During the chaos caused by Farrakhan supporter Noah Green at the US Capitol last year, Joe Biden’s handlers lost...
California celebrates Indigenous Peoples’ Day by sacrificing 6 people to climate goddess Greta Thunberg
Everyone already knows that Columbus was a literal Hitler from the 15th century and that all woke people celebrate Indigenous...
