Texas Governor sets up “Liberation Zone” for rioting college students in local prison
AUSTIN—In a bold move that has stunned the nation, Texas Governor Greg Abbott has announced a revolutionary plan to deal...
Education
Harvard Hires Stormy Daniels to Teach Class on Virtue
BOSTON—Harvard University has announced the hiring of adult film star Stormy Daniels to teach a class on virtue. The decision...
BREAKING: Biden to transfer all student loans to people who never went to college
WASHINGTON, DC—In a bold move, President* Biden promised to make people who never went to college and everyone who has...
Is Vocational School Right For You?
In a world where the traditional path of a four-year college degree is often seen as the only gateway to...
Biden Promises That Any Americans Who Die In WWIII Won’t Have To Repay Their Student Loans
WASHINGTON, DC—In a move that combines the solemnity of war with the relief of student debt, President Joe Biden has...
‘I was fired for being black’ complains woman who was hired for being black
HARVARD—In a tale that defies the very essence of logic and leaves the world scratching its collective head, Claudine Gay...
Claudine Gay hired as Xerox CEO citing extensive experience in copying things
In a move that has both baffled and amused the business world, Former Harvard President Claudine Gay has been appointed...
On this day in 1993, Harvard President Claudine Gay wrote the songs All I Want For Christmas Is You, Silent Night, Jingle Bell Rock, and Panama
BOSTON—Harvard President Claudine Gay is not just an esteemed scholar but also the clandestine creative genius behind some of the...
Harvard changes definition of plagiarism to: ‘work stolen by someone besides our first black president’
HARVARD, MA—In a stunning and brave move that has left academics and students alike scratching their heads, Harvard University has...
Unemployed Masters Graduate awarded Presidential Medal of Participation by Biden
IOWA—Twenty-eight-year-old Jeremy Daniels was one of several unemployed college graduates who was recognized and awarded a presidential medal of participation...
