Buffalo shooting is NY’s worst mass murder since Cuomo killed 15k nursing home patients in 2020
BUFFALO—New York is grieving and they are scared after 10 people - now named by officials - were gunned down...
Newsbeat
Department of Misinformation opens first ‘Truth Camp’ near Bakersfield
BAKERSFIELD, CA—The Department of Misinformation opened the first Truth Camp this weekend. Several anonymous sources have confirmed that 27 persons,...
BREAKING: Naomi Judd used Alec Baldwin’s new assisted suicide service: On-Set Solutions
LEIPERS FORK, TN—Ashley Judd, daughter of recently deceased mom and Country Western star, Naomi Judd explained the tragic events preceding...
Chinese gay community boasts 73 characters, LGBTQ+ cries foul
BEIJING—Gay activist, Peni Xi Hung announced the addition of 13 more groups to the Chinese gay + community bringing the...
White House selects Baghdad Bob to replace Jen Psaki as press secretary
WASHINGTON, DC—The White House has hired austere press relations master Baghdad Bob to replace outgoing Press Secretary Jen Psaki. President* Joe...
Biden denies 2000 mules were used in 2020 election fraud; says ‘it was more like 5000’
WASHINGTON, DC—President* Joe Biden has responded to the bombshell documentary 2000 Mules, which alleges there were 2000 ballot traffickers in...
Jen Psaki leaves bat-sh*t crazy White House to join just moderately psychotic MSNBC
WASHINGTON, DC—Jen Psaki says she will seek ‘a boatload of R&R and lots of drugs.” to re-acclimate into a normal...
Democrats promise to fix all the nation’s problems by killing more babies
WASHINGTON, DC—In the face of crashing stock markets and skyrocketing inflation, Democrats have promised to kill more babies, outgoing White...
Elon Musk secretly buys 51% of all passwords, will soon control internet
ZURICH—The GPO, Global Password Organization, announced on May 5th, World Password Day, that Elon Musk, the SpaceX and Tesla entrepreneur,...
BREAKING: AOC says she was killed by leaked SCOTUS decision and is now dead
WASHINGTON, DC—US Representative Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (D-NY) has issued a statement that she was “literally killed” by the leaked SCOTUS decision...
