CNN: Trump Poised to Invade Washington DC in Alarming Escalation
In what experts are calling “the most dangerous moment in American history since the last time Trump was president,” Donald...
Newsbeat
BREAKING: Ghislaine Maxwell has tragically committed suicide next week
NEW YORK–In a shocking turn of events, Ghislaine Maxwell, co-conspirator to Jeffrey Epstein, has tragically killed herself next week. Maxwell...
BREAKING: FBI conclude that Jeffrey Epstein never existed
In a shocking turn of events, the Federal Bureau of Investigation has announced that Jeffrey Epstein, the disgraced financier and...
BREAKING: The FBI finally done scrubbing video to make it look like no one entered Jeffrey Epstein’s cell the night he was suicided
NEW YORK—In a stunning display of transparency and technological wizardry, the FBI has released what it claims is the definitive,...
BREAKING: Disney names P. Diddy new CEO citing appeal with children
VISTA DEL MAL, CA—In a surprising move, Disney has announced that music mogul P. Diddy—who now goes by the pseudonym...
Senator Tillis Delivers Fiery CNN Audition Tape
In a performance that had cable news executives scrambling for their contracts, North Carolina Senator Thom Tillis unleashed a red-hot...
Walmart pulls Fried Chicken & Watermelon ‘Juneteenth’ ice cream after backlash
LOS ANGELES—Walmart has apologized for the Juneteenth items that its selling at its stores, specifically the Watermelon & Fried Chicken...
Protesters firebomb the country they live in and hate so they aren’t deported and have to go back to the country they love
LOS ANGELES—In a dazzling display of logic-defying activism, anti-ICE protesters turned the streets of Los Angeles into a blazing paradox...
Walmart opens new ‘Loot!’ section in all of its California stores
UNITED STATES—Walmart CEO Dan McMillon announced today that Walmart will have a special looting section in all of its San...
EYEWITNESS: Local baby recounts harrowing experience when she realized there was a fire in a neighborhood building
In a jaw-dropping exclusive with 18-month-old local legend Emma "Giggles" Thompson, the tiny tot channeled the spirit of viral sensation...
