AOC: ‘I was murdered in the failed Russian coup attempt’
US—Representative Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, commonly known as AOC, has come forward with a stunning revelation: she was killed during the failed...
Politics
After hearing of Titanic sub implosion, Biden promises to send $100B more to Ukraine
In a stunning display of his commitment to international affairs, President* Joe Biden has reportedly pledged to send an additional...
Biden tells people trapped in the Titanic submersible to save themselves by ‘getting vaccinated now’
In a stunning display of problem-solving skills, President Joe Biden has once again demonstrated his unwavering commitment to the power...
Biden launches 2024 presidential run with ‘Join the Killective’ T-shirts
In a move that surprised absolutely no one, President Joe Biden has officially announced his bid for the 2024 presidential...
BREAKING: Guy who got his son out of felony gun charges gives lecture on gun control
In a stunning and brave display, President Joe Biden recently took to the podium to give a lecture on gun...
Biden silences critics with a vigorous bike ride in a Burley
In a bid to silence his critics and prove that he's fit as a fiddle, President Joe Biden has taken...
Biden releases new campaign logo: Briben 2024
In a surprising turn of events, the Biden administration has unveiled its new campaign logo for the upcoming 2024 presidential...
BREAKING: United States to Discontinue Production of Bananas So People Will Stop Calling Us a Banana Republic
WASHINGTON, DC—The White House announced today that the United States will no longer produce bananas so people will stop saying...
California bans the use of the number 2 as being hateful against non-binary children
SACRAMENTO—In a groundbreaking move to promote inclusivity and protect sensitive individuals, the state of California has announced a ban on...
OP-ED: I’m Coming Out As Pro-LGBTQ
Pride month is in full gear, and there’s no better time to come out in support of our pro-LGBTQ allies...
