BREAKING: Many ‘totally innocent’ people begging for presidential pardons for the crimes they didn’t commit
WASHINGTON, DC—A parade of individuals, who swear on their mother's honor they've committed no crimes, are now clamoring for presidential...
Politics
Trump Hollywood Envoy’s replaces fire-damaged Hollywood sign with “Trump Won”
HOLLYWOOD—In a bold and highly controversial move, Donald Trump's newly appointed Hollywood envoy, consisting of Mel Gibson, Jon Voight, and...
BREAKING: New fake government climate data in line with completely fabricated climate forecast
WASHINGTON, DC—In a stunning display of governmental efficiency and creativity, the Department of Fabrication (DoF) has released a new set...
Greta Thunberg’s Global Warming Conference cancelled due to sub-arctic freezing temps
A symposium sponsored by the International Global Warming Trust was cancelled today in Michigan as temperatures dipped below -50 degrees...
In lieu of aid, Kamala enrolls California fire victims in Jelly of the Month Club
SACRAMENTO, CA — In what can only be described as a masterstroke of administrative innovation, Vice President Kamala Harris has...
Hunter Biden claims new ‘masterpieces’ lost in wildfire were totally worth $200 million
LOS ANGELES—In a bizarre twist to the already tumultuous narrative surrounding Hunter Biden, the son of President Joe Biden, has...
BREAKING: Pete Hegseth storms Senate Armed Forces Hearing; claims Capitol for Jesus Christ
WASHINGTON, DC—Pete Hegseth, clad in full medieval knight regalia, stormed into the Senate Armed Forces Committee hearing with the zeal...
BREAKING: Pete Hegseth opens senate confirmation hearing by calling Adam Schiff ‘so ugly even Epstein wouldn’t bring him to his island’
Washington, D.C.—The room was electric as Pete Hegseth, the Fox News host-turned-cabinet nominee, kicked off his Senate confirmation hearing with...
BREAKING: In lieu of aid, Biden reassures California wildfire victims he will be sending $100 billion to Ukraine in their name
LOS ANGELES—In a heartfelt gesture of international solidarity, President* Joe Biden assured the victims of California’s devastating wildfires that while...
AOC horrified that people are using gas-powered blowtorches instead of solar-powered one to start wildfires in California
In an astonishing revelation that has left the progressive community reeling, Representative Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (AOC) expressed her horror upon discovering...
