Fauci Orders ‘No Sex Until AIDS is Cured’
WASHINGTON, DC—As states begin easing back on lockdown restrictions, Dr. Anthony Fauci is now pushing for new draconian measures to...
Politics
Democrats declare War on Gravity after Biden stair incident
The effort to defend the Dominion elected China Puppet is never ending battle. Trump's demands for honest elections, the difficulty...
BREAKING: Biden outlaws shooting people at grocery stores
Following a mass shooting in Boulder, Colorado Monday, President Biden has decided to take unprecedented measures to protect the country...
Secret Service hires Nepali sherpa to carry Biden up and down White House stairs
NEPAL—The United States Secret Service announced today that they have added a Nepali Sherpa named Norbu to the President’s security...
AOC: If socialism is so bad, why did over 100 million people sacrifice their lives for it in the 20th century?
Deep Thoughts by Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez If recent trends over the past few years are any indication, it’s that socialism is...
Biden installs windmills in White House to take advantage of all that wind knocking people over
WASHINGTON, DC—President Joe Biden has installed several massive windmills in the White House to take advantage of the intense wind...
George Floyd Celebrates 300 Days of Sobriety
MINNEAPOLIS, MN—George Floyd, Patron Saint in the Church of Woke, celebrates 300 consecutive drug-free days today. Mr. Floyd famously quit...
Biden blames fall on wind from Putin blowing him a kiss from Russia
WASHINGTON, DC—President Joe Biden blamed his fall while climbing Air Force One's stairs on Russian President Vladimir Putin blowing him...
White House staff confused about who’s still peeing on the floors after Biden’s dogs were removed
WASHINGTON, DC—White House cleaning staff are flummoxed about who is still peeing all over the floors of the Oval Office...
Biden tells migrants ‘don’t come over’ while he hands out gift bags at the border
BIG BEND, TX–President Joe Biden said in an exclusive interview with Genesius Times's George Snuffalufagus on Tuesday that his message...
