Hochul: ‘It’s a conspiracy theory that New Yorkers don’t want to die in a Nuclear Armageddon’
New York Gov. Kathy Hochul (D), said, Tuesday, that what really scares people in the Empire State isn't the threat...
Politics
Your Guide to the 2022 Midterm Elections
Are you having trouble navigating the upcoming midterm elections? Well, you’re in luck, because we at the Genesius Times are...
BREAKING: Grindr drops Paul Pelosi sponsorship after he turns on his gay sex hammer Grindr date
SAN FRANCISCO—The gay sex dating app Grindr has dropped their Paul Pelosi sponsorship after he turned on his gay sex...
Elon Musk shatters world record after going 12 hours without killing himself after publicly insulting Hillary Clinton
TWITVILLE, CA—Austere billionaire businessman Elon Musk has shattered the world record after going a full 12 hours without killing himself...
BREAKING: Biden sends $40B in military aid to Twitter execs following Elon Musk annexation
SILICON VALLEY, CA—US President* Joe Biden has sent over $40 billion in military aid and weapons to Twitter executives following...
BREAKING: Violent hate speech rampant on Twitter just hours after Elon Musk’s takeover
SILICON VALLEY, CA—Just hours after International Man of Mystery Elon Musk's takeover of the bastion of progressive propaganda Twitter, violent...
Free speech is rooted in oppression
It's clear to everyone and anyone with at least one masters degree in queer studies or lesbian dance theory that...
Fetterman shows off new ‘I ❤️ Fracking’ tattoo
After a dismal debate performance in which Pennsylvania Senate candidate Jon Fetterman made a half-hearted attempt to sway voters with...
BREAKING: Fetterman invites Biden on campaign trail to make him look good
PENNSYLVANIA—Pennsylvania Democrat and U.S. Senate Candidate John Fetterman, became the first candidate in his party to ask President Biden for...
Support for Biden surges among vampires after he announces plan to blot out the sun
WASHINGTON, DC—The Biden Administration announced plans this week to halt climate change by blocking out the sun, and SuperPAC Vampires for an...
