Newsom assures Californians his vaccine passports will be ‘super cute’
SACRAMENTO, CA—Governor Gavin Newsom announced a new way to show that you've been vaccinated against COVID-19 and allayed fears about...
Science
Fauci declares ‘I am science’ as he launches new COVID Inquisition Panel
WASHINGTON, DC—Grand Science Wizard Saint Anthony Fauci has declared what everyone in the mainstream media has known for a while:...
Man who bought 1 million acres of arctic tundra for post-warming golf course wants money back
Qaqortoq, Greenland—Charlie Natt, a Berkeley, CA resident is suing Donald Trump and "all the Republicans" after his Arctic Circle real...
Pride parade cancelled due to 90% chance of fire and brimstone
A pride parade scheduled to be held on Saturday in the twin cities of Sodom and Gomorrah has been cancelled...
BREAKING: Several people actually still believe what Anthony Fauci says
US—In a shocking poll conducted by the Pew Pew Research Center, it appears that several people—maybe upwards of 150 across...
BREAKING: Demi Lovato self-identifies as Hernando Desoto I-40 Bridge
Demi Lovato is now more important than attacks on Israel, the attempt to federalize elections, the open border, and even...
AFT calls for schools to remain closed until death is eradicated from the universe
WASHINGTON, DC—The American Federation of Teachers (D-DC) has called for all schools to remain closed until the scourge of death...
VIDEO: Fauci recommends wearing masks in the shower
WASHINGTON, DC—In a new video, a newly bearded Dr. Anthony Fauci warns of a new threat of spreading COVID while...
CDC: ‘You must trust the science that will be completely different 2 weeks from now’
ATLANTA—The nation's top health expert, CDC Director Rochelle Walensky said on Genesius Times's "This Week's BS," that Americans must "trust...
Rabbis confirm wearing three masks will guarantee you a seat in the Garden of Eden
WORLD—Rabbis from around the world have signed onto a letter stating that wearing three masks will guarantee you a seat...
