China pinky-promises to lower carbon emissions by 2069
BEIJING—Xi Jinping and all of his advisors have pinky-promised to lower their country’s emissions by the year 2069. The promise...
World
Biden and Harris form mariachi band to woo Latino voters
After the holding the biggest hispanic concert in history by playing Despacito on his cellphone, according to hispanic political expert...
Omar: ‘Trump’s peace deal is racist against terrorists’
MINNEAPOLIS—Not everyone is happy about Trump's advancement of peace relations between Israel and her Arab neighbors. US Representative Ilhan Omar...
CNN: Trump recklessly brings Middle East to brink of peace
(CNN) US President Donald Trump has recklessly brought the Middle East to the brink of peace as United Arab Emirates...
Satan buys summer home in California after Newsom makes it just right for him
LOS ANGELES--The fallen angel Lucifer, also known as Satan, has purchased a summer home in California after Governor Gavin Newsom...
Antifa arsonists blame climate change for making them set dozens of fires on West Coast
Former president Barack Obama and California Governor Gavin Newsom have used their celebrity to condemn global warming for the devastating...
NFL plays anthem for every ethnicity on Earth before first game to promote unity
In response to the increased racial tension in America, the NFL opened its first game with the white national anthem,...
AOC praises California for cutting carbon footprint to zero in blackout
People may be suffering in California due to socialist economic policies and corrupt politicians but some Americans are celebrating. US...
Dead Antifa protesters enjoying a fiery but ‘mostly peaceful’ afterlife
HELL—Several recently deceased Antifa warriors are enjoying a fiery but "mostly peaceful" afterlife in the eternal fires of Hell. A...
Australians shocked to find they have no right to free speech after giving up their guns
MELBOURNE--Australians have been shocked to find that they have no right to free speech shortly after giving up their guns....
