BREAKING: Biden honors LGBTQ Pride by drone-bombing Syria with rainbow explosives
PENTAGON—US President* Joe Biden celebrated LGBTQ Pride month by dropping rainbow-colored bombs on Syria yesterday. The dead and wounded civilians...
World
Kamala announces trip to the Borders but says there’s no crisis there
WASHINGTON, DC--Vice President* Kamala Harris has announced a trip to the Borders after a constant stream of criticism from Republicans,...
Biden retaliates for Chinese defector by giving China the entire FBI
WASHINGTON, DC--Not fully understanding how it works, US President* Joe Biden promised to give the entire Federal Bureau of Investigation...
BREAKING: FBI foils insurrection plot devised by the FBI
WASHINGTON, DC—The FBI has foiled the January 6 insurrection plot devised by the FBI, US Attorney General* Merrick Garland said...
BREAKING: Democrats vote to remove Southern states from US for ties to slavery
WASHINGTON DC—In a shocking and unprecedented move, congressional Democrats have voted to remove Southern states from the Union for their...
Time: Biden taking on stairs
Did you catch a wiff of the new Time cover? Those aviators! "On his way to meet Vladimir Putin, Secret...
BREAKING: Biden declares Branch Covidians official state religion; will persecute non-believers
WASHINGTON, DC—President* Joe Biden, in conjunction with the future President* Kamala Harris, has declared that Fauciism is the new state...
BREAKING: Guatamala deports Kamala Harris
GUATAMALA CITY—Immigration authorities in Guatamala have deported an annoying American named Kamala Harris. She will be extradited to Mexico, where...
Kamala Harris flies 10-truck caravan to Guatamala to lecture them on climate change
GUATAMALA CITY—Vice President* Kamala Harris flew a 10-Suburban caravan to Guatamala in order to lecture them on climate change. "It...
Man who bought 1 million acres of arctic tundra for post-warming golf course wants money back
Qaqortoq, Greenland—Charlie Natt, a Berkeley, CA resident is suing Donald Trump and "all the Republicans" after his Arctic Circle real...
