AOC: ‘If global warming is a hoax, why is it 90° in Australia now in the middle of WINTER?!’ 
BREAKING: Pete Hegseth storms Senate Armed Forces Hearing; claims Capitol for Jesus Christ 
BREAKING: Pete Hegseth opens senate confirmation hearing by calling Adam Schiff ‘so ugly even Epstein wouldn’t bring him to his island’ 
BREAKING: In lieu of aid, Biden reassures California wildfire victims he will be sending $100 billion to Ukraine in their name 
AOC horrified that people are using gas-powered blowtorches instead of solar-powered one to start wildfires in California 
Hospital CEO wonders where all the nurses went after he fired them for not getting jab
EDGEWOOD, TX—St. Luke's Hospital CEO Jimmy Onenutt is wondering where all the nurses went after he just fired them for...
Satire That’s Truer Than News
BREAKING: DC bombing threat says he doesn’t know why there was an FBI paystub in his car
WASHINGTON, DC—The DC bomb threat suspect has surrendered to law enforcement officials peacefully after threatening on a livestream from his...
Introducing Taliban Barbie with hijab, Quran, and a forced marriage license!
Toy maker Mattel has introduced a wonderful toy for all the girls and boys who identify as girls out there:...
REPORT: Millions of Biden voters are rolling over in their graves
US--Reports from across the country confirm that millions of Biden voters are so ashamed by the recent scandals of the...
New Yorkers posing as Afghani terrorists in order to move freely without vaccine passport
NEW YORK--Thousands of New Yorkers across the city today are pretending to be Afghani terrorists so that they can move...
Biden invites Taliban to White House to show he means business
WASHINGTON, DC—President* Biden invited the Taliban to an extravagant dinner at the White House "to show them I mean business,"...
Missing Joe Biden will now be featured on milk cartons
US—Milk carton manufacturers will be featuring a picture of President* Joe Biden on their packaging in an effort to find...
AOC disappointed Taliban is using ‘gas trucks’ to rape and pillage instead of electric vehicles
WASHINGTON, DC—News of the horrifying takeover of Afghanistan by the Taliban who are raping and beheading opposition as they go...
CNN: Taliban conducts mostly peaceful beheadings, rapes after retaking Afghanistan
(CNN) Afghanistan citizens face mostly peaceful executions, beheadings, and violent rapes of adolescent women as the Taliban sweeps across the...
