US facing ‘massive shortage’ of conspiracy theories as all of them have come true 
Stephen Colbert becomes neo-Nazi to garner funds from Southern Poverty Law Center 
Israel’s Pride Festival Near Ancient Site of Sodom and Gomorrah Cancelled Over 85% Chance of Fire and Brimstone 
Ilhan Omar Quietly Shuts Down Her “Quality Winary Center” as Ethics Scrutiny Intensifies 
Breaking: Bill Clinton Adopts Eric Swalwell: “He’s The Son I Never Had” 
Anti-ICE protesters hand out “Love Thy Neighbor (Or Else)” Molotov cocktails
LOS ANGELES—In a bold new twist on community outreach, anti-ICE protesters took to the streets of Los Angeles last night,...
Satire That’s Truer Than News
Walmart opens new ‘Loot!’ section in all of its California stores
UNITED STATES—Walmart CEO Dan McMillon announced today that Walmart will have a special looting section in all of its San...
BREAKING: Hundreds protest US in support of the countries they don’t want to go back to
LOS ANGELES—Hundreds in several cities around the US took to the streets this weekend to protest Donald Trump's deportation and...
LAPD Chief offers to fly Kyle Rittenhouse to LA to help out during riots
LOS ANGELES, CA — In a stunning and totally not-made-up press conference this morning, LAPD Chief Jim McDonnell shocked the...
BREAKING: Pope Leo XIV offers to host peace talks between Trump and Elon
VATICAN CITY—Pope Leo XIV has thrown his mitre into the ring, offering to mediate a high-stakes peace summit between former...
Leftists Scramble to Put Out Fires They Started on Their Teslas Now That Elon Is Feuding with Trump
US—Left-leaning Tesla owners across the country are frantically trying to extinguish the fires they set on their own electric vehicles...
Electric vehicle fires on Chinese cargo ships are proof that we’re doing the right thing for the environment
Dear eco-champions, green dreamers, and lovers of a good fiery spectacle, rejoice! The catastrophic Morning Midas disaster— that glorious blaze...
BREAKING: Trump replaces official Biden portrait at White House
WASHINGTON, DC—President Donald J. Trump, freshly reinstated in the Oval Office, has replaced President Joe Biden’s official White House portrait...
Swifties Vow to Endure Taylor Swift’s Horrible Music on Repeat to Fund Her Masters Buyback
In a bizarre twist that has the music world clutching its pearls and reaching for noise-canceling headphones, millions of Taylor...
VIDEO: Greta Thunberg yells at Mount Etna for recklessly violating climate change regulation
ITATY—Climate enthusiast Greta Thunberg has flown to Italy to yell at the world's most active volcano Mount Etna for violating international...
