France, Last Remaining African Team, Eliminated from World Cup 
Satan Trying To Figure Out Why Wars Are Breaking Out All Over Hell 
Mamdani Opens New NYC Restaurant Allowing Comrades to Literally ‘Eat the Rich’ 
Trump Orders All Israel Pride Flags to Be Flown at Half-Mast in Honor of Lindsey Graham’s Passing 
BREAKING: Lindsey Graham Dies After Accidentally Uttering the Word “Peace” 
AOC: The mass shooting in Australia didn’t really happen because guns are illegal there
Folks, let's talk about this supposed "mass shooting" down in Australia yesterday. You know, the one at Bondi Beach during...
Satire That’s Truer Than News
Prosecutors Confirm Charlie Kirk was Killed by the Same ‘Magic Bullet’ that Killed JFK
In a stunning announcement that has finally put to rest decades of conspiracy theories, the Federal Bureau of Investigation confirmed...
James Gunn Passes on Chance to Make Any Money on Supergirl Film by not Casting Sydney Sweeney
Hollywood, CA — In a move that has left studio accountants weeping openly into their spreadsheets, DC Studios co-CEO James...
BREAKING: Immigrants demand their host country become more like the horrible place they fled from
New York / London / Berlin – In a bold display of cultural appreciation, thousands of newly arrived immigrants took...
Cinnabon Removes the ‘N’s’ to Prove they Aren’t Racist
Atlanta, GA – In a groundbreaking act of corporate virtue that no one asked for, Cinnabon announced Tuesday that it...
Democrats Hold Candlelight Vigil for Fallen Drug Cartel Boat Crews Lost at Sea
WASHINGTON, D.C. – In a moving display of cross-border solidarity, hundreds of progressive activists gathered on the National Mall Tuesday...
Pope Leo says Orcs and Hobbits can be ‘friends’ and ‘murderous Orcs are just misunderstood’
VATICAN CITY – In a surprise move that has left both Middle-earth scholars and the College of Cardinals reaching for...
FOR SALE: Totally Legitimate High-Speed Offshore Fishing Vessel – $175,000 OBO
Tired of slow, boring boats that actually catch fish? Looking for something with real zip that can outrun literally anything...
JUST IN: Brave young Democrat influencers cut off their testicles in protest of Trump
In an unprecedented display of political fervor, a group of young, progressive activists known as the "Brave Democrats" - comprised...
Gen Z Olympics: Dutch Unknown Casually Scrolls Past Germany to Win Inaugural 200 m Doomscroll Gold
PARIS (GT) – In a result that has left German sports psychologists quietly scheduling emergency sessions, an unheralded 23-year-old from...
