BREAKING: Nation shocked to see a president in a room full of children and not sniff any of them 
BREAKING: Democrats warn DOGE that it’s unconstitutional for the federal government to be efficient 
Democrats warn they may never win another election again if Trump shuts down their USAID money laundering operation 
BREAKING: Trump halts Canadian tariffs after Trudeau agrees put “Daddy Trump” on all Canadian currency 
BREAKING: Trump converts all USAID offices into Spirit Halloween stores following shut down 
This Day in ‘Fiery but Mostly Peaceful’ History: Feds Massacre 76 in Waco Siege
The Waco siege, also known as the Waco massacre, was the fiery but mostly peaceful law enforcement siege of the...
Satire That’s Truer Than News
BREAKING: January 6 defendants released after claiming they were ‘just protesting for Gaza’
WASHINGTON, DC—In a shocking twist of events, several January 6 defendants have been released from custody after claiming that they...
Vogue unveils shocking cover featuring Zelensky embracing new wife Mike Johnson
In a surprising turn of events, Vogue has just released its newest cover featuring the unexpected pairing of Ukrainian President...
Zelensky reminds every American to do their taxes so that he will get paid
KYIV—Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelensky made an urgent plea for every American to make sure and do their taxes so that...
I’d rather have a thermonuclear world war with Biden than world peace under Trump
It has been scientifically proven that a massive nuclear holocaust under the best president ever, President Biden, would be better...
BREAKING: As a result of Iran’s direct attack on Israel Biden sends another $10 billion to Iran
WASHINGTON, DC—President Barack Obama Joe Biden has once again surprised the world with his unwavering generosity towards Iran. In response...
BREAKING: Eyewitnesses report that the Ghost of Kyiv has entered Iraqi airspace
BAGHDAD—Eyewitnesses have reported that the elusive and mysterious Ghost of Kyiv has entered Iranian airspace, taking on the Iranian air...
BREAKING: OJ Simpson led police on a low speed chase in extended cab white Bronco hearse to funeral
LOS ANGELES—OJ Simpson, the infamous former football star, led police on a slow and low speed chase on the 410...
Gavin Newsom threatens to blot out the sun again if we don’t sacrifice a million babies to climate goddess Greta Thunberg this year
SACRAMENTO—California Governor Gavin Newsom has issued an ultimatum to the world: sacrifice 1 million babies to climate goddess Greta Thunberg...
