FBI quickly closes New Orleans terror case so they can get back to monitoring the real terrorists: concerned parents at school board meetings 
BREAKING: Biden bans all trucks after 2 commit terrorist attacks New Years Eve 
BREAKING: Leader of ISIS, Barack Obama claims credit for New Orleans terrorist attack 
BREAKING: Ilhan Omar offers condolences to family of ISIS-linked New Orleans terrorist 
BREAKING: Nation horrified to learn terrorist wasn’t a white supremacist 
BREAKING: Nation horrified to learn Nashville shooter wasn’t a white supremacist
NASHVILLE—In a shocking revelation, the nation was stunned to learn that the recent Nashville shooter wasn't a white supremacist. This...
Satire That’s Truer Than News
‘The Marvels’ set to shatter opening-weekend record for virtue signals
HOLLYWOOD—In a stunning turn of events for the world of cinema, "The Marvels" is on track to shatter opening weekend...
FBI Shuts Down Investigation Of Eric Adams’s Finances After He Writes ‘Loan Repayment’ On All Checks
NEW YORK—In a shocking turn of events that has left financial investigators baffled, the FBI has abruptly suspended its probe...
Hasbro releases new ‘Woke Monopoly’
PAWTUCKET, RI — Hasbro, the renowned toy and board game company, is setting a new trend in the world of...
BREAKING: FBI awards Ray Epps ‘Employee of the Year’
WASHINGTON, DC—Many Democrats on the January 6th Committee haven't heard of Ray Epps, but that's all about to change as...
Democrats warn that House Speaker who hasn’t made millions on insider trading is threat to democracy
WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a shocking twist, Democrats are making waves on Capitol Hill as they announce new criteria for...
Amid inflation, Millennials forced to ‘rent a vowel’ on Wheel of Fortune
Amid staggering inflation, Millennials have been forced to change their financial habits. Most worrisome is that Millennial contestants on Wheel...
Normal white guy wins “scariest” Halloween costume contest without costume
A normal white guy won the annual Halloween costume contest at the University of Madison Wisconsin's Union over the weekend...
Biden eases fears of nuclear war by posting ‘Nuke Free Zones’ signs around the country
WASHINGTON, DC—President* Joe Biden has allayed all fears of global thermonuclear war by posting "Nuke Free Zone" signs all over...
