BREAKING: AOC launches ‘Free Rico’ campaign because ‘RICO is not a crime!’
WASHINGTON, DC—Progressive darling Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (AOC) has announced the launch of a new campaign, "Free Rico." The campaign, which aims...
Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez
AOC: If we just make everything the Bidens did legal, then they didn’t do anything wrong
WASHINGTON, DC—The ever-inspiring Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (AOC) has proposed a groundbreaking solution to put an end to all those niggling concerns...
BREAKING: Biden to transfer all student loans to people who never went to college
WASHINGTON, DC—In a bold move, President* Biden promised to make people who never went to college and everyone who has...
AOC: Why don’t we take out a $34 trillion loan from China to pay off the entire national debt?
As a public figure, I've grown accustomed to dealing with all sorts of attention, both positive and negative. However, there's...
AOC: ‘I don’t need truckers. I get my food from the grocery store’
Everyone's making a big deal about truckers uniting and the possibility that they may stop driving into New York City...
AOC: Stop killing ducks to make duck tape!
Hello, beautiful Earth warriors! It's your friendly neighborhood AOC here, and today, I need to talk to you about a...
AOC: If transwomen aren’t women, why are they winning all the women’s sports?
I've got something super important to talk about. So, like, if transwomen aren't women, why are they winning all the...
NY Governor Hochul says students no longer have to think for themselves: ‘We’ll do it for you!’
ALBANY, NY—In a groundbreaking move, New York Governor Kathy Hochul has proudly announced that students across the state will no...
AOC Says She Was ‘Nearly Killed’ by Release of Jan 6 Footage
In a dramatic revelation that sent shockwaves through Capitol Hill, Representative Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (AOC) recently declared that she was "nearly...
AOC: If communism doesn’t work, how come Xi Jinping solved San Francisco’s homeless epidemic and poop all over the place just by visiting?
Hello fellow kids, gather 'round for a hot take that's fresher than last night's microwave pizza. So, like, if communism...
