Democrats insist century-old Social Security recipients are real, and they all voted for Biden
Washington, D.C. - In what can only be described as the most unexpected audit in history, Elon Musk's newly established...
Chuck Schumer
Schumer demands a thorough probe of Elon Musk’s Harry Bōlz for any possible privacy violations
Washington, D.C. – In a stunning turn of events, Senate Majority Leader Chuck Schumer (D-NY) has called for an immediate...
Chuck Schumer celebrates Black History Month by devouring rack of ribs and whole watermelon at press conference
WASHINGTON, DC—In an act of cultural appreciation—or perhaps a severe misinterpretation of cultural sensitivity—Chuck Schumer held a press conference to...
BREAKING: Democrats warn DOGE that it’s unconstitutional for the federal government to be efficient
WASHINGTON, DC—In an unprecedented political maneuver, Democrats have issued a warning to Elon Musk's "Department of Government Efficiency" (DOGE), claiming...
Democrats warn they may never win another election again if Trump shuts down their USAID money laundering operation
WASHINGTON, DC–In a dramatic press conference held in the shadow of the Capitol, Democratic leaders have issued a dire warning...
BREAKING: Democrats demand that Trump stop deporting their voters
WASHINGTON, D.C. -The Democratic Party has issued an official demand to President Donald Trump, urging him to halt the deportation...
BREAKING: Christine Blasey-Ford reveals Kash Patel & Tulsi Gabbard raped her in 7th grade
CALIFORNIA—In a startling new development, Christine Blasey-Ford, who previously testified during the contentious 2018 Supreme Court confirmation hearings of Brett...
Congress unveils statue of Jamaal Bowman pulling fire alarm in Capitol Rotunda
WASHINGTON, DC—The Congress has unveiled a new statue of outgoing Congressman Jamaal Bowman pulling a fire alarm, commemorating his unique...
BREAKING: Congress works through weekend to finally pass a balanced budget at 3am on April 1st
Congress has managed to pass a balanced budget at 3am on April 1st, thanks to the bipartisan efforts of House...
BREAKING: Mitch McConnell to step down from Senate leadership role to focus more on staring blankly into space
WASHINGTON, DC—In a move that has left Capitol Hill both puzzled and oddly relieved, Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell has...
