COVID-positive Barack Obama will social distance from Michelle for another 4 years
MARTHA'S VINEYARD-- After testing positive for COVID-19, former President Barack Obama says he will continue to social distance from Michelle,...
Vladimir Putin
Biden bans buying oil from Russia; mandates buying Russian oil from China marked up 10%
WASHINGTON, DC—US President* Joe Biden announced Tuesday the U.S. will ban all oil imports from Russia and require imports of...
Putin opens Uyghur concentration camp to make everyone like him again
MOSCOW—After receiving widespread condemnation for his invasion of Ukraine, Russian President Vladimir Putin has opened up Russia's very own Uyghur...
CNN threatens to stop delivering fake news to Russia if they don’t withdraw from Ukraine
ATLANTA—The leader of fake news distribution in the West, CNN, is threatening to stop delivering their disinformation to Russia if...
Biden won’t come out from under bed; White House to try ice cream cone
Washington DC—President Biden, apparently shaken by the Russian invasion and the threat of a Chinese invasion is refusing to come...
BREAKING: AOC says she was ‘nearly raped’ in Ukraine invasion
WASHINGTON, DC–Over a year after the War of January 6th, US Representative Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (D-NY) has issued a statement that...
BREAKING: Vladimir Putin completely eradicates COVID by invading Ukraine
US—In a miraculous turn of events, Vladimir Putin has eradicated COVID-19 from the face of the earth by invading Ukraine....
BREAKING: Biden threatens to misgender Putin if Russia doesn’t leave Ukraine
WASHINGTON, DC—US President* Joe Biden says he is prepared retaliate for the Ukraine invasion by misgendering Vladimir Putin. “Our number...
AOC horrified Russia is using ‘gas-powered’ tanks to run over Ukrainians instead of hybrids
KYIV—The streets of the capital have turned into chaos after Russia has invaded the Ukraine with tanks and armored vehicles....
AOC asks Putin for small part of Ukraine to start her utopia in
BROOKLYN—Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez has asked Russian despot Putin for a small part of the Ukraine she’s had her eye on for...
