Newsom celebrates Indigenous Peoples’ Day by sacrificing 666 people to climate goddess Greta
SACRAMENTO—California Governor Gavin Newsom will be celebrating Indigenous Peoples' Day at the capitol by sacrificing six unlucky human beings to...
climate change
Sacrifice a human and 7 more ways to celebrate Indigenous Peoples’ Day
Everyone knows that if you celebrate Columbus Day, you’re a Nazi bigot, so that’s why most woke cultures and municipalities...
AOC horrified that Hamas used gas-powered vehicles to terrorize Israel instead of electric vehicles
WASHINGTON, DC—In a stunning twist of events, Congresswoman Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, known for her passionate advocacy of environmental issues, expressed shock...
Protestor who glued herself to Senator Feinstein can still vote on her behalf
WASHINGTON, DC—A climate change protestor who glued herself to Senator Dianne Feinstein earlier this month can continue voting on her...
VP Harris freezes during speech: media calls it “breathtaking.”
DETROIT—Vice President Kamala Harris froze for almost 30 minutes during a speech at a Detroit manufacturing plant last night, prompting...
BREAKING: Hurricane Monica blows through DC as Hurricane Hilary peters out in California
In a bizarre twist of meteorological fate, the nation has been treated to an unusual double feature – Hurricane Monica...
Arsonist changes name to ‘Climate Change’ so that people can say Climate Change causes wildfires
MAUI, HI—An arsonist who has started several fires in Hawaii, Oregon, and California has legally changed his name to "Climate...
BREAKING: Obama chef Tafari Campbell’s death ruled as ‘climate change’
In a shocking turn of events, the tragic death of former and current President Barack Obama's chef Tafari Campbell has...
TX Gov Abbott installs marine barriers along the southern border to halt the catastrophic effects of climate change
In an unexpected move to combat the effects of climate change, Texas Governor Greg Abbott has unveiled a groundbreaking plan:...
VIDEO: Greta Thunberg yells at Mount Etna for recklessly violating climate change regulation
ITATY—Climate enthusiast Greta Thunberg has flown to Italy to yell at the world's most active volcano Mount Etna for violating international...
