WOKE: Victoria’s Secret replaces all ‘Angel’ lingerie models with Chet the human turd
NEW YORK CITY—In perhaps the wokest of all corporate wokeness, lingerie dealer Victoria's Secret has done away with its attractive...
fashion
Newsom assures Californians his vaccine passports will be ‘super cute’
SACRAMENTO, CA—Governor Gavin Newsom announced a new way to show that you've been vaccinated against COVID-19 and allayed fears about...
Plastic bags are the new double face masks
"Plastic bagging" is a sensible and easy way to virtue signal to your fashionable death Many of us who watched...
Roberts introduces new uniforms for Supreme Court justices
WASHINGTON DC--Chief Justice John Roberts introduced the new uniform for all Supreme Court justices including pink robes and a pink...
500 lb. helmet made to keep all of Colin Kaepernick’s hair perfect during next NFL game
Astrophysicists have been tasked with creating a football helmet to keep Colin Kaepernick's hair perfect if he should play in...
Hipster still wearing skinny jeans despite not being able to show them off in Zoom meetings
GRAND RAPIDS, MI — Strictly abiding by Michigan's lock-down regulations, hipster Andrew Sadura is still wearing his favorite pair of...
TRENDING: Sexy hazmat suits for that COVID-19 beach bod
Many sexy womenz across the country are suffering from the stay-at-home coronavirus orders, unable to show off their beach bods...
Pelosi wears commemorative toilet paper earrings to coronavirus press conference
In a bold move of class and style during a chaotic time, Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi (D-CA) wore...
First all-female spacewalk cancelled because they ‘couldn’t find the perfect outfit’
A historic spacewalk was scheduled to occur this week, with only women operating outside the ISS for the first time...
