Biden fitted with anti-sniff cone to protect children
WOONSOCKET, RI—Students at Woonsocket Elementary rejoiced as President Biden arrived for his latest unity speech to berate half the country...
pedophilia
Biden says all migrant children sent to his home in Delaware will be met with open arms in his shower
SHADY ACRES, DE—President* Joe Biden said that all migrant children who are sent to his home in Delaware will be...
Heavily-armed Antifa to stand guard over Biden’s ‘kid-friendly’ showers from now on
WASHINGTON, DC—Following the successful defense of a kid-friendly drag show in Texas, President* Biden has employed heavily-armed Antifas to stand...
BREAKING: Disney buys ‘Epstein Island’ for new kids-only theme park
VISTA DEL MAL, CA—Disney has purchased the controversial island owned by convicted pedophile and sex trafficker Jeffrey Epstein. The company...
BREAKING: New York to pay pedophiles $100k to relocate to NYC from Florida
NEW YORK—Mayor Eric Adams has launched a new campaign to lure pedophiles and groomers to the city following the passage...
Disney replaces bigoted white CIS-gender Mickey mascot with inclusive Pedobear in mouse ears
VISTA DEL MAL, CA—In an effort to stay ahead of the woke wave, Disney Corporation has replaced its bigoted white,...
Netflix corrects problematic ‘Cuties’ by putting Joe Biden in every scene
LOS GATOS, CA—Amid widespread backlash over the provocative film 'Cuties', Netflix has apologized and corrected the problematic content by putting...
Netflix CEO Jerry Epstino defends sexualization of children in ‘Cuties’
LOS GATOS, CA—New Netflix CEO Jerry Epstino has issued a public defense of the new Netflix original film 'Cuties' (“Mignonnes”),...
Conservative transgender fired from Drag Queen Story Hour for ‘just sitting there reading’
Conservative transgender woman Beatrice Arnold was fired from a Pittsburgh area library Drag Queen Story Hour for not being perverted...
Epstein prison guards thought ‘suicide watch’ meant watching him commit suicide
Jeffrey Epstein has been suicided in a Manhattan Correctional Center in Manhattan at roughly 7:30. After a failed suicide attempt...
