Zelenskyyy adds another ‘y’ to his name to become even more lovable than before
KYIV—Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelenskyyy has added another 'y' to his name to become even more lovable than before, sources say....
Russia
BREAKING: Psaki tests positive for COVID; will miss Biden’s false flag assassination in Europe
WASHINGTON, DC—White House Press Secretary Jen Psaki said she tested positive for COVID-19 Tuesday so she will not be joining President* Joe Biden...
Nuclear missile repairman #1 on 2022 Top Ten Jobs list, first time since 1957
What are the top skills employers are looking for in 2022? Genesius Times has them rated, based on a poll...
Justin Trudeau banned from Russia; can’t return new babushka
MOSCOW—Russian officials banned Justin Trudeau from entry to the country, cancelling an upcoming meeting scheduled months ago. The Prime Minister...
Beto O’Rourke volunteers to fight for Ukraine with battalion of NERF gun sharpshooters
EL PASO—Failed presidential candidate Beto O'Rourke is flying to the Ukraine to join the fight against the Russians with a...
In response to Russian attack, Biden imposes several new sanctions on American citizens
WASHINGTON, DC—Following the further attack by Russia on Ukraine, the Biden administration announced new sanctions on American citizens, ensuring further...
US ‘very worried’ Russia may seize US bioweapons labs in Ukraine that don’t exist
WASHINGTON, DC—Government officials are "very worried" that Russia may seize US bioweapons labs in Ukraine that don't exist. "Do we...
Biden bans buying oil from Russia; mandates buying Russian oil from China marked up 10%
WASHINGTON, DC—US President* Joe Biden announced Tuesday the U.S. will ban all oil imports from Russia and require imports of...
Putin opens Uyghur concentration camp to make everyone like him again
MOSCOW—After receiving widespread condemnation for his invasion of Ukraine, Russian President Vladimir Putin has opened up Russia's very own Uyghur...
BREAKING: Florida invades Ukraine so that CNN will leave them too
TALLAHASSEE—The state of Florida has invaded the sovereign nation of Ukraine so that CNN will leave them too. Florida also...
