BREAKING: Google office quarantined after someone was wished a ‘Merry Christmas’
MOUNTAIN VIEW, CA—The Google Headquarters shut down Monday after a delivery man cheerfully wished a receptionist a "Merry Christmas". All...
vaccination
Biden: ‘The most important thing for Israelis and Palestinians to do is to get vaccinated’
Washington, DC—In an unexpected twist of diplomacy, President Biden, while addressing the ongoing Israeli-Palestinian conflict, offered a unique perspective: "The...
Biden tells people trapped in the Titanic submersible to save themselves by ‘getting vaccinated now’
In a stunning display of problem-solving skills, President Joe Biden has once again demonstrated his unwavering commitment to the power...
Gov Hochul urges New Yorkers to protect themselves from Canadian fire smoke by ‘getting vaccinated now’
NEW YORK—In an unexpected twist, New York Governor Kathy Hochul has unveiled a groundbreaking strategy to protect New Yorkers from...
BREAKING: Unvaxxed, unhealthy, sick, risk to all of society, person wins Wimbledon
WIMBLEDON, ENGLAND—An unhealthy, unvaxxed, sick, risk to society somehow won one of the most grueling sporting events in the world:...
Newsom takes break from force-vaccinating people to lecture everyone about bodily autonomy
SACRAMENTO—Governor Gavin Newsom has taken a short break from forcing people to wear masks, stay inside, and getting vaccinated in...
BREAKING: Hillary Clinton tests negative for being president, again
CHAPPAQUA, NY—Former Secretary of State Hillary Clinton tested negative for being president again, her spokeswoman stated in a brief briefing...
Twitter bans Twitter for allowing CDC tweets contradicting CDC
TWATVILLE, CA—Social media behemoth Twitter has been banned indefinitely from its own platform for violating its community standards of not...
Big Bird falls off stage, cancels all appearances following vaccination
US--Big Bird has cancelled all appearances after falling off stage following highly publicized vaccination. The eight-foot two-inch (249 cm) tall...
Biden taps Weinstein to lead ‘Jobs for Jabs’ program citing his experience putting things into people’s bodies for them to get work
WASHINGTON, DC—US President* Joe Biden has appointed famous Hollywood producer Harvey Weinstein to lead his new "Jab for a Job"...
