Here Are Other Mysteries The Secret Service Couldn’t Solve
The mystery of the coke found in the White House wouldn’t be the first time the Secret Service couldn’t solve...
White House
EXCLUSIVE: Security tapes show AOC doing lines of cocaine in White House library
WASHINGTON, DC—Genesius Times have obtained security video tapes from the White House showing that the alleged cocaine left in the...
BREAKING: President Biden Accidentally Locks Himself in Oval Office, Can’t Find Key
WASHINGTON, DC—CNN reports that President Biden accidentally locked himself in the Oval Office and couldn’t remember where he put the...
BREAKING: President Biden Sells White House for $400 Million to Fund War in Ukraine
WASHINGTON, DC—President Biden has officially sold the White House for $400 million to continue funding the war in Ukraine. DC...
White House Forced to Walk Back Biden’s ‘I am the President’ Remark
During an interview on CBS’s 60 Minutes, Joe Biden claimed that he was “the President of the United States.” Biden’s...
JUST IN: White House Press Secretary replaced by a literal gaslight
WASHINGTON, DC—After acknowledging the difficulty in constantly gaslighting the American public about everything from the economy to the war in...
BREAKING: Biden tests negative for IQ, experiencing mild symptoms
WASHINGTON, DC--President* Joe Biden said Thursday that he's tested negative for IQ but will continue to work while in isolation...
Jen Psaki leaves bat-sh*t crazy White House to join just moderately psychotic MSNBC
WASHINGTON, DC—Jen Psaki says she will seek ‘a boatload of R&R and lots of drugs.” to re-acclimate into a normal...
Biden won’t come out from under bed; White House to try ice cream cone
Washington DC—President Biden, apparently shaken by the Russian invasion and the threat of a Chinese invasion is refusing to come...
Biden sends Christmas cards laced with anthrax to millions of Americans
WASHINGTON, DC—President* Joe Biden and his wife, Doctor* Jill Biden want to wish every unvaccinated American a "wonderful, cheery and...
