Breaking WELY News Update
The US government is collapsing and we’re pretending it’s not! All in the latest news update! Stay current on the...
Year: 2021
Bill Gates warns he can’t turn on the 5G depopulation switch until everyone’s vaccinated
SEATTLE—Bill & Melinda Gates Foundation Chair Bill Gates has warned that he can't turn on the 5G depopulation switch until...
Biden narrowly misses price of the $3.5 trillion budget on Price is Right by $3.5 trillion
BURBANK, California—Joe Biden narrowly missed the correct price on a $3.5 trillion budget on the Price is Right today, guessing...
Australia officially returns to being a prison colony
SYDNEY, Australia—Australia began as a prison colony for the United Kingdom and they have officially returned to being just a...
BREAKING: Biden deports all horses to Mexico
Equine members of the Animal Kingdom have been a part of man's civilization for thousands of years. Horses have been...
Australian cops to beat protesters until they learn being unvaxxed is bad for your health
MELBOURNE, Australia—Police across the city and country are continuing a campaign to beat protesters until they learn that being unvaccinated...
Biden makes all Monopoly money legal tender to pay for $3.5 trillion spending bill
WASHINGTON, DC—President* Biden continues to innovate in the wake of a difficult fiscal situation for the United States. Faced with...
De Blasio exempts blacks from NYC COVID vaccine mandate for ‘equality and science’
NEW YORK—After facing backlash from the Black Lives Matter movement over the city's COVID vaccine mandate, Mayor Bill de Blasio...
NFL has made over 1 million fans gay this year
NEW YORK—Ever since the NFL came out of the closet as being gay this summer, they have made a point...
Local leftist replaces his ‘Resist!’ bumper sticker with a ‘Govern Me Harder Daddy!’ sticker
OSHKOSH, WI–A local leftist, Wankie McLittlejon, has finally switched his ‘Resist!’ bumper sticker from the dark ages of the Trump...
