Biden sends Fauci to Amazon to practice vaccine blow dart technique
XCHITH-TI, Amazon—Ideas have been pouring in from all over the world on how the federal government can somehow overcome the...
Year: 2021
Biden correcting yard signs for nurses who refuse vaccine after a year on front line
DELAWARE—President* Joe Biden was seen correcting the yard signs of several homes of nurses in his Delaware neighborhood from "A...
BREAKING: We must force-dorf the undorfed to dorf the dorfed with the dorf that didn’t dorf the dorfed
US—A new study was just released showing that we must force-dorf the undorfed in order to dorf the dorfed with...
BREAKING: COVID doesn’t spread at awards shows; galas
HOLLYWOOD—Celebrities and elites on both coasts will be pleased to know that the most dangerous disease in human history, COVID-19,...
Everyone at the Emmys wins award for pretending to care
HOHLLYWOOD—Seth Rogan won the first award of the night for virtue signaling about COVID right off the bat. "Good to...
Ghost of Norm MacDonald joins Genesius Times
Most of the comedy world was shaken by the announcement of the passing of comedian Norm MacDonald, who Steven Crowder...
US Capitol Police increase security ahead of Saturday’s FBI false flag event
WASHINGTON, DC—The U.S. Capitol Police is erecting a temporary fence around the Capitol in anticipation of a planned FBI false flag...
Biden mandates shoving marbles up everyone’s asses after tweet by Nicki Minaj
WASHINGTON, DC--President* Biden has issued a rare edict mandating that all Americans have marbles shoved up their asses to fight...
Astronaut’s space suit fails when child doesn’t wear his own space suit
SPACE- U.S. Astronaut Glen Miller died yesterday when conducting routine maintenance on the International Space Station. While tethered to the...
You idiots need to wear seatbelts so that my seatbelt will work
I don't know who needs to hear this but you idiots need to use your seatbelts so that mine will...
