BREAKING: Trump buys Ukraine, renames it ‘MyKraine’ in unprecedented peace deal
KYIV, MYKRAINE—In what is being described as the “Really Big Deal”, President Donald Trump held a press conference this morning...
Month: January 2022
New White House cat bears strong resemblance to missing cat from Pennsylvania
Willow Glen farmer Andy “Buck’ Clydebrook shook his head when told that his cat, Willow, missing for a while, looked...
Apple releases blatantly racist ‘man stealing watermelon’ emoji
CUPERTINO, CA—Tech giant Apple just released a blatantly racist "man stealing watermelon" emoji, according to sources. "I don't know who...
Biden announces ‘Top Ten’ demands for Russia and Putin
WASHINGTON, DC—President Joe Biden announced his Top Ten demands for Russia and Putin as tensions at the Ukraine border escalate:1)....
Chicago Mayor Lightfoot offers cash reward to take down Batman
CHICAGO—Mayor Lori Lightfoot has stepped it up a notch by offering a cash reward for anyone who can capture and...
Trudeau goes into hiding as trucker convoy descends on Ottawa
OTTAWA, CA—Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau has gone into hiding as upwards of 50,000 trucks and over 500,000 people descend...
Joe Rogan replaces Neil Young in Crosby, Stills & Nash supergroup
Legendary folk rock supergroup Crosby, Stills & Nash announced comedian Joe Rogan joined the band and will begin touring unvaccinated-mandated...
Fauci: new federal ‘Jumbo’, XXX size anal swabs approved for TSA airport use
WASHINGTON, DC—Airline travel will be much safer with the use of the new Omicron, XXX anal swabs being utilized by...
OPED: I was raped by whoever Biden chooses to replace Breyer on the Supreme Court
This is incredibly difficult for me to do but I feel that it’s necessary to come forward and expose the...
Introducing Clarissa Thomas, the first black female Supreme Court justice
President* Joe Biden promised that he would pick a black female to replace Justice Stephen Breyer on the country's highest...
