BREAKING: We declare Kanye West the 46th president of the United States
WASHINGTON DC—Prestigious news organization Genesius Times has declared Kanye West the 46th president of the United States of America. West...
Exavier Saskagoochie
Exavier is an excellent writer—tremendous. He's really very, very talented. And his hair is really great too. He should have a couple Pulitzers under his belt by now if there was any justice. If he brightened your day at all please consider tipping a coffee or a leg of mutton through this link!
Biden won’t release the cure to cancer until Trump concedes
WASHINGTON DC—Democratic presidential nominee Joe Biden says he will not release the cure to cancer until after President Donald Trump...
BREAKING: Nevada switches to Common Core math with 10k Republican votes left to count
LAS VEGAS—Election officials in Nevada warned that they may not have results for the presidential election until some time after...
Hillary Clinton says Republicans should accept defeat just like she did in 2016
CHAPPAQUA, NY--Former Secretary of State and former presidential nominee Hillary Clinton made the rounds on various news shows Friday scolding...
Biden: ‘They aren’t illegal ballots, they’re undocumented votes’
WASHINGTON DC—Presidential nominee Joe Biden has defended the vast number of illegal votes being uncovered by citizens around the country...
Jeffrey Epstein’s prison guards hired to ensure secure election in Philadelphia
PHILADELPHIA—The New York Metropolitan Jail guards who were watching Jeffrey Epstein while he was suicided have been brought in to ensure...
BREAKING: Masked man commits armed robbery in broad daylight
PHILADELPHIA—A masked man has committed armed robbery in broad daylight. The robbery occurred Friday morning at the Pennsylvania Convention Center,...
BREAKING: Biden breaks record for most dead votes ever for a presidential candidate in US history
US—Joe Biden has received more votes from dead people than any presidential candidate in U.S. history, surpassing the record set...
Nevada apologizes for technical difficulties while they try to steal the election for Biden
CARSON CITY, NV—Nevada election officials apologized for technical difficulties while they scramble to steal the election for Democratic presidential nominee...
BREAKING: Wisconsin officials find 170,000 Biden ballots on Chinese shipping container
MADISON, WI—It appeared that President Donald Trump was going to win Wisconsin in the 2020 election until—quite miraculously—election officials discovered...
