Exavier Saskagoochie

Exavier is an excellent writer—tremendous. He's really very, very talented. And his hair is really great too. He should have a couple Pulitzers under his belt by now if there was any justice. If he brightened your day at all please consider tipping a coffee or a leg of mutton through this link!

Having not found 5 righteous people in Chicago, Trump orders a surge of fire and brimstone

Exavier Saskagoochie July 22, 2020

President Donald Trump, having not found even 5 righteous people in the city of Chicago, announced plans Wednesday to send...

Portland moms finally pick up their kids from their little Antifa protest

Exavier Saskagoochie July 22, 2020

PORTLAND, OR--Moms from around Portland finally came to pick up their kids from their little Antifa protest at the federal...

Vegas releases odds for Ghislaine Maxwell being suicided next week

Exavier Saskagoochie July 21, 2020

LAS VEGAS--Oddsmakers are having trouble finding people to bet that Jeffrey Epstein's CIA and sex trafficking associate Ghislaine Maxwell will...

BREAKING: California mandates conversion therapy for white people

Exavier Saskagoochie July 21, 2020

SACRAMENTO—Governor Gavin Newsom has announced a new mandated program of conversion therapy for people stricken with whiteness. "Californians have woken...

Planned Parenthood will only abort black babies from now on to support Black Lives Matter

Exavier Saskagoochie July 20, 2020

In solidarity with the social justice movement Black Lives Matter, Planned Parenthood Corporation will only abort black babies going forward....

Tear-gassed protesters discover face masks don’t work

Exavier Saskagoochie July 20, 2020

PORTLAND—Thousands of tear-gassed protesters from across the country are discovering that their face masks don't work when they get a...

Nike makes sweatshop workers work overtime to stitch ‘Equality’ on NBA jerseys

Exavier Saskagoochie July 18, 2020

BEAVERTON, OR—Nike has agreed to force its thousands of sweatshop workers to work overtime for free in order to stitch...

Joe Biden agrees to three televised debates with Barron Trump

Exavier Saskagoochie July 17, 2020

Presumptive Democratic presidential nominee Joe Biden has agreed to three televised debates with Barron Trump, President Trump's youngest son. Biden...