US Treasury introduces design for new $1 bill
WASHINGTON, DC—President* Joe Biden has introduced a design for the new $1 bill. It will look exactly like a $20...
Business
Burger King releases new gay burger topped with monkeypox or AIDS
Burger King wants its customers to be fully immersed in Pride this year by releasing their new Gay Whoppers, which...
Bill Gates releases new book ‘I Want to Kill Half of You’
SEATTLE—Bill Gates recently released his new book, "I Want to Kill Half of You," in which he offers some insightful observations...
Bill Gates releases Windows OS for humans: ‘MonkeySoft’ Vista
SEATTLE—While Bill Gates officially has left the Windows board to focus on bioterrorism, he has returned briefly for a release...
Elongate: SpaceX employee complains about Elon Musk’s huge rocket
AUSTIN—A former SpaceX employee is complaining about CEO Elon Musk's huge rocket in a scandal that has been dubbed "Elongate"....
Amid shortage, US infants identifying as illegal immigrants to get baby formula from Biden
Springfield—American infants from San Diego to Sheboygan are identifying as illegal immigrants in order to get hard-to-come-by baby formula shipped...
Elon Musk buys Motel 6 to build first motel on Mars
CARROLTON, TX—Elon Musk announced the purchase of Motel 6 from the Blackstone Group, this morning. He said the nationwide, popular...
Biden promises to fix baby formula shortage by sending more weapons to Ukraine
WASHINGTON, DC—President* Joe Biden addressed the "shocking" baby formula shortage in the US by sending more weapons to Ukraine. "Really...
