All positions in new gay NFL will be referred to as ‘tight end’
NEW YORK—After recently announcing that the NFL is gay with new pink sequin uniforms, Commissioner Roger Goodell has made the...
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NFL releases new super-gay uniforms
NEW YORK—Doubling down on their "Football is gay" message, the NFL has released its new super-gay uniforms for the 2021...
Kamala announces trip to the Borders but says there’s no crisis there
WASHINGTON, DC--Vice President* Kamala Harris has announced a trip to the Borders after a constant stream of criticism from Republicans,...
Victoria’s Secret replaces all ‘Angel’ lingerie models with Jabba the Hutt
NEW YORK CITY—In perhaps the wokest of all corporate wokeness, lingerie dealer Victoria's Secret has done away with its attractive...
WOKE: Victoria’s Secret replaces all ‘Angel’ lingerie models with Chet the human turd
NEW YORK CITY—In perhaps the wokest of all corporate wokeness, lingerie dealer Victoria's Secret has done away with its attractive...
Fauci declares ‘I am science’ as he launches new COVID Inquisition Panel
WASHINGTON, DC—Grand Science Wizard Saint Anthony Fauci has declared what everyone in the mainstream media has known for a while:...
YouTube bans YouTube for showing videos of Dr. Fauci contradicting Dr. Fauci
MOUNTAIN VIEW, CA—Google's media giant YouTube has been banned indefinitely from its own video streaming service for violating its community...
Kamala Harris flies 10-truck caravan to Guatamala to lecture them on climate change
GUATAMALA CITY—Vice President* Kamala Harris flew a 10-Suburban caravan to Guatamala in order to lecture them on climate change. "It...
Facebook fact-checkers have investigated themselves and found they did nothing wrong
MOUNTAIN VIEW, CA—Officials at the various Facebook fact-checking services have investigated themselves over several allegations that they promoted misinformation during...
BREAKING: Demi Lovato self-identifies as Hernando Desoto I-40 Bridge
Demi Lovato is now more important than attacks on Israel, the attempt to federalize elections, the open border, and even...
