Low-skilled workers shocked to find themselves unemployed after winning $15 minimum wage hike
Millions of low-skilled workers, fresh off a victory to force their employers to pay them more than they are worth,...
Business
BREAKING: New York declares State of Emergency, erects wall to keep taxpayers from leaving the state
New York, N.Y.—A contingent of New York politicians who celebrated Amazon’s decision to not build their second headquarters in the...
New York reveals new motto: ‘We’ll kill your babies and run your business out of town!’
Content with exactly how things are, New York has recently expanded abortion access and quashed a potential partnership with Amazon.com,...
Spacious 2-bed, 1-bath pothole for rent in great neighborhood
Great location right in the heart of town! This spacious pothole comes with a large fenced in driveway and easy...
Ocasio-Cortez enlists first cow-fart police to combat global warming
Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez has started implementing her Green New Deal already, before any congressional approval or without any rational second opinion....
STUDY: 67% of employees still trying to escape conversation with chatty coworkers
U.S.—A new study conducted by the CDC has found that almost 70% of all office workers are currently attempting to...
Wealthy legislator proposes 100% tax on everyone who is richer than he is
The first-ever living turd elected to Congress, Chet, has proposed a new tax on the highest income earners. According to...
BREAKING: Everyone’s mother officially enters Democratic primary to defeat Trump
In a move that many analysts had predicted for months, Everyone's mother officially put her name in the Democratic primary...
Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez campaigns with Dr. Evil for $1 million minimum wage
After many municipalities have mandated employers pay a minimum wage of $15 an hour, others are campaigning for higher minimum...
Gillette Introduces ‘Ball Blades’ to Help Fight ‘Toxic Masculinity’ via Castration
The razor giant Gillette is embracing the #MeToo movement with its new line of blades designed especially for excising testes....
