US Bishops release ‘King Biden Version’ Bible with complete ‘Book of Palms’
WASHINGTON DC—Following an apparent gaffe, when the devoutly Catholic Joe Biden accidentally said "the palmist" instead of "the psalmist", the...
Culture
Biden warns not to eat too much turkey or the trunalimunumaprzure will make you sleepy
WASHINGTON DC—Self-appointed President-Elect Joe Biden warned of the many dangers of socializing during a Thanksgiving address Wednesday, warning people particularly...
Sidney Powell shocks Thanksgiving guests by serving 700 pounds of fried sea monster
ATLANTA—Attorney Sidney Powell shocked her Thanksgiving guests on Thursday by serving 700 pounds of fried sea monster instead of the...
Twitter launches free-speech alternative called Twit
SAN FRANCISCO—Propaganda app CEO Jack "Rasputin" Dorsey has launched a new free-speech alternative to Twitter called Twit. “I just don't...
Official How-To Guide for Safely Celebrating Thanksgiving in 2020
Millions of Americans find themselves unsure how to celebrate Thanksgiving this year due to the China Virus. Using recommendations and...
Nike launches Antifa Spirit Urban Gear just in time for Black Friday
BEAVERTON, OR--Athletic equipment maker Nike has launched its Antifa Spirit Gear just in time for Black Friday. Nike spokesperson, William...
Gov. Cuomo wins Emmy for Best Portrayal of A Mass Murderer
NEW YORK—Governor Andrew Cuomo has won an Emmy for Best Portrayal of a Mass Murderer during the coronavirus pandemic. He...
Local leftist replaces his ‘Resist!’ bumper sticker with an ‘Obey’ sticker
OSHKOSH, WI--A local leftist, Wankie McJohnson, has finally switched his 'Resist!' bumper sticker to one that says 'Obey'. "I know...
Mainstream media send hundreds of crickets to cover election fraud press conference
WASHINGTON DC—Mainstream media outlets sent all their best crickets to cover the election fraud case press conference by Trump's legal...
BREAKING: Dominion voting machines switched votes to Pope Francis in 2013 papal conclave
VATICAN—In a bombshell revelation from the recently released McCarrick Report, the Vatican has admitted to temporarily installing Dominion voting machines...
