Trump’s new border wall will exclude California, parts of Oregon and Washington
With Trump's border wall in full production, authorities have added an additional 2000 mile section that would remove California and...
Newsbeat
ACLU sues God for only creating two genders
Serving the papers to God proved to be the most daunting part of the lawsuit brought forth by the ACLU...
BREAKING: Global Warming Apocalypse, originally scheduled for 2020, has been postponed to 2050
Due to the forecast of typical rain, sun, wind, possible thunderstorms, and basically the same climate across the globe throughout...
In appeal to moderates, Bernie calls for worker-ownership of his gulags
As wealth inequality has increased, so has the injustice of the capitalist America. Democratic socialist Bernie Sanders hopes to correct...
BREAKING: Biden never officially declared innocent of rape
The Mueller resignation press conference has opened the flood gates of condemnation in accordance with the new standards of jurisprudence...
Mueller: Trump ‘obstructed justice by not doing what he was accused of doing’
Special Counsel Robert Mueller, while announcing his resignation, declared that President Trump had "obstructed justice by not doing what he...
Ocasio-Cortez releases university degree to silence skeptics
Many people have become threatened by the success of an intelligent woman of color in a powerful position—Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez—so much...
BREAKING: Harambe posthumously announces 2020 presidential bid
Just when you thought the field for the 2020 Democratic presidential nomination couldn't get any fuller or more clown-like, long...
Facebook bans itself for acting too much like Nazis
After Facebook banned several prominent personalities for posting things they didn't agree with and acting too much like Nazis, the...
Joe Biden releases logo for 2020 presidential campaign
Joe Biden has announced his candidacy for the 2020 presidential election. His campaign is focusing on a "hands-on" approach to...
