BREAKING: Biden issues executive order outlawing shooting people at schools
US—Following a mass shooting in Uvalde, TX Monday, President* Biden has decided to take unprecedented measures to protect the country...
Politics
BREAKING: AOC confirms her longtime boyfriend is pregnant with her child
WASHINGTON, DC—Representative Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (D-NY) is putting the unconfirmed reports about her love life to rest. In an exclusive interview with...
Buffalo shooting is NY’s worst mass murder since Cuomo killed 15k nursing home patients in 2020
BUFFALO—New York is grieving and they are scared after 10 people - now named by officials - were gunned down...
Biden to release 100m barrels of baby formula from strategic reserves, send it to the border
WASHINGTON, DC—Americans can rest easy on the baby food shortage according to President Joe Biden, announcing he will issue an...
On first day, new Biden Press Secretary answers ‘Because I’m a black lesbian’ to every question
WASHINGTON, DC—In response to every question about the economy to the war in Ukraine, the new White House Press Secretary...
Department of Misinformation opens first ‘Truth Camp’ near Bakersfield
BAKERSFIELD, CA—The Department of Misinformation opened the first Truth Camp this weekend. Several anonymous sources have confirmed that 27 persons,...
Amid shortage, US infants identifying as illegal immigrants to get baby formula from Biden
Springfield—American infants from San Diego to Sheboygan are identifying as illegal immigrants in order to get hard-to-come-by baby formula shipped...
Biden to release 100m barrels of baby formula from strategic reserves, send it to Ukraine
WASHINGTON, DC—Americans can rest easy on the baby food shortage according to President Joe Biden, announcing he will issue an...
