Satan follows Big Tech’s lead, bans Trump from Hell
HADES—Today, Satan tweeted out that, effective immediately, Trump and his supporters will be banned from
World
President Biden declares Eagles Superbowl LV Champs by executive order
WASHINGTON, DC—At 5AM Eastern Time today President-Elect Biden issued another executive order, declaring the Philadelphia
Economist Paul Krugman suggests workers use only their left hand to boost employment
UNITED STATES—In today’s edition of the former newspaper New York Times Nobel Prize winning-economist Paul
BREAKING: AOC recalls barely making it out alive of Ewok siege on Endor base
FOREST MOON—A teary-eyed Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (D-NY) on Monday recounted the horrifying events during the
BREAKING: Thousands of immigrants heading to US to become victims of systemic racism
McALLEN, TX—A migrant caravan from Africa and Central America is heading for the United States
BREAKING: Biden ends mass discussion about ‘Kids in cages’
THE BORDER—The great humanitarian Joe Biden has overturned the horrible Trump immigration policy of “kids
Groundhog Day: Fauci sees his shadow so there will be 6 more weeks of quarantine
PUNXSUTAWNEY, PA—Anthony Fauci saw his shadow Tuesday, predicting six more weeks of quarantine. No one
BREAKING: Biden threatens to stop Iran’s nuclear weapon program by giving them $180 billion
WASHINGTON, DC—In a show of foreign policy muscle, President Joe Biden threatened to stop the
POLL: Most people unimpressed with their 2-week free trial of the New World Order
A poll conducted by the Pew Pew Institute shows that a majority of Americans are
Greta Thunberg wins Nobel Prize for her role in Black Lives Matter
STOCKHOLM—The Nobel Committee has proven that they are not racist by giving the Nobel Peace
