Hey RFK Jr., Hands Off! Why Poison in Our Food Is Actually Good 
Millions of new tariff experts unsure how to pay off their student loan debt 
Climate activists protest Elon Musk by sending ‘NO DOGE’ smoke signals up from burning Tesla batteries 
AOC: Only Illegal Immigrants Should Get Due Process Because they Broke the Law to be Here So Clearly They Really Want It 
BREAKING: Katy Perry declares herself pope after reading the Bible for 11 minutes 
Joe Biden offers to donate brain to science but science rejects it as ‘Potential Spam’
Good old Uncle Joe Biden has virtually disappeared from sight as we battle COVID-19. Is this by accident? Hell no....
Satire That’s Truer Than News
Church disguises itself as an abortion clinic so government will let it stay open during lockdown
Richmond, VA â With churches around the country closing and violators of stay-at-home orders being fined and imprisoned, one church...
BREAKING: Harambe has died from coronavirus in New York City
Harambe, the beloved lowland gorilla who was shot and killed in 2016 after befriending a little boy at the Cincinnati...
Michigan Governor enlists Combine Army to help enforce quarantine
Detroit, MI -- According to embedded sources, Michigan's designated administrator Gretchen Whitmer has reached out to the Combine Army from...
VIDEO: Actual footage of New York City counting COVID-19 deaths
Genesius Times has discovered actual footage of New York City officials counting COVID-19 deaths. Viewer discretion is advised:
China recommends US remain closed until they can afford to buy it on eBay
Though nobody believes China has vanquished the virus, it looks like they are back open for business. Productivity seems almost...
BREAKING: Amid falling oil prices, Exxon forced to layoff several congressmen
Goldman Sachs said on Sunday that oil prices would continue to fall in the coming weeks due to a coronavirus-led...
Joe Biden wonders why he didn’t get any trick-or-treaters yesterday
Presummed Democratic presidential nominee Joe Biden is heartbroken that he didn't get any trick-or-treaters at his house yesterday, Easter Sunday...
Wildlife reclaiming parks during lockdown: ‘The brontosauruses have quadrupled’
YOSEMITE NATIONAL PARKâUsually, when you drive through Yosemite Village, you have a tough time not running over gnarly rock climbers...
Fauci blames Trump for Fauci saying we don’t have to worry about coronavirus in January
Every day this Fauci guy kicks our President in the groin and keeps on smiling at the camera as if...
