Jaguar introduces new car to match its new ad campaign 
BREAKING: I was raped by whoever Trump selects for one of his cabinet positions 
BREAKING: Elon Musk buys MSNBC to constantly air video of Alex Jones giving Morning Joe and Mika noogies 
CNN: Startled by Loud Noises, President Kennedy Trips and Falls in Limousine 
This Day In Mostly-Peaceful History: President Kennedy Goes Scenic Ride through Dallas 
BREAKING: AOC introduces bill outlawing mass shootings
Following a string of mass shootings, Rep Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez has had enough. "Welp, we were so stupid for so long...
Satire That’s Truer Than News
Brave local man cuts off his penis so that other men won’t rape people with theirs
SPRINGFIELD—A brave local man, Hugh Janus, has cut off his penis so that other men won't rape people. This follows...
Fetterman finally returns from Burning Man 2022: no-one noticed he was gone
PHILADELPHIA: Pennsylvania senator John Fetterman is back home today after being stuck at the Burning Man festival in Nevada for...
EXCLUSIVE: Mike Johnson won Speakership by promising to ban AOC’s ‘pull my finger’ gag
Washington, D.C. - In a surprising turn of events, newly elected Speaker of the House Mike Johnson has made it...
BREAKING: Trump opens new luxurious Palestinian Underground Bunker Hotel & Casino to promote world peace
West Bank, Middle East - In a surprising twist, former U.S. President Donald Trump has unveiled his most ambitious venture...
REPORT: New Study Finds Men Who Have Taken The Covid Vaccine May Not Be Able To Get Pregnant
San Francisco, CA - In a groundbreaking scientific discovery, a new study has shaken the foundations of biology as we...
Biden: ‘The most important thing for Israelis and Palestinians to do is to get vaccinated’
Washington, DC—In an unexpected twist of diplomacy, President Biden, while addressing the ongoing Israeli-Palestinian conflict, offered a unique perspective: "The...
Americans praise Congress for not doing anything the last 12 days
WASHINGTON, DC—Congress has become the darling of the nation for its remarkable feat of doing absolutely nothing in the last...
WATCH: Anthony Fauci, Bill Gates, and Klaus Schwab star in Monster Vax
Happy Halloween for those of us still alive! Muuhhahahahahaha! https://twitter.com/slave_2_liberty/status/1715127703303856345
BREAKING: Republicans considering making Alex Jones Speaker of the House after McCarthy’s ouster
In a stunning and seemingly surreal turn of events, sources close to the Republican Party have revealed that they are...
