BREAKING: April Fool’s Day cancelled because reality is so ridiculous
US President* Joe Biden has cancelled the national holiday April Fool's Day due to severe competition from the ridiculousness of...
Joe Biden
Biden to hang 6 Easter Bunnies in honor of Trans Visibility Day
WASHINGTON, DC—In a shocking turn of events, President Joe Biden has announced that he will be personally hanging six Easter...
Biden wishes everyone a ‘Merry Thanksgiving!’
WASHINGTON, DC—President Joe Biden has inadvertently confused the nation by wishing everyone a "Merry Thanksgiving" on Easter Sunday. The gaffe,...
If you don’t want to be raped by cannibal migrants, you might be a racist
In today's increasingly diverse and interconnected world, it is crucial that we remain vigilant in our pursuit of equality, acceptance,...
BREAKING: CIA claims responsibility for ISIS claiming responsibility for Moscow terror attack
WASHINGTON, DC—The Central Intelligence Agency (CIA) has claimed responsibility for the Islamic State (ISIS) claiming responsibility for the recent Moscow...
BREAKING: Congress narrowly avoids being fiscally responsible again
WASHINGTON, DC—In a feat of financial acrobatics that left economists shaking their heads and taxpayers reaching for aspirin, Speaker Mike...
AOC: If we just make everything the Bidens did legal, then they didn’t do anything wrong
WASHINGTON, DC—The ever-inspiring Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (AOC) has proposed a groundbreaking solution to put an end to all those niggling concerns...
‘Bloodbaths are only okay when killing millions of babies’ says devout Catholic Nancy Pelosi
WASHINGTON, DC—In a fiery appearance on CNN, Representative Nancy Pelosi (D-CA) took Donald Trump to task for his misuse of...
BREAKING: Old man yells at everyone
SPRINGFIELD—President Joe Biden delivered his State of the Union address last night, leaving Springfield residents scratching their heads in confusion....
How dare Biden call austere undocumented murderers ‘illegal’!
In a shocking display of bigotry and ignorance, President Joe Biden has had the audacity to refer to undocumented murders...
