Biden becomes first computer-generated AI to receive Democratic nomination
WILMINGTON, DE—Joe Biden has become the first ever computer-generated artificial intelligence program to receive a major party presidential nomination after...
COVID-19
Americans trying to contract COVID-19 to get out of watching 2020 Democratic National Convention
The pain caused by the 2020 DNC Convention is becoming too much to handle for liberals. While more people are...
Branch Covidians apply for official religion status
WASHINGTON DC—The Branch Covidian cult has applied to be recognized an official religion with the federal government. "We are just...
People very eager to get multiple shots of new Russian COVID vaccine
MOSCOW—Russia plans to approve the world’s first COVID-19 vaccine in under two weeks – despite concerns about its safety and...
PETITION to have the first batch of COVID-19 vaccine shoved up Bill Gates’s ass
Fighting misinformation and conspiracy theories about the novel coronavirus has almost been as hard as battling the pandemic itself. And a new...
CDC warns that COVID death toll may surpass Clinton body count
ATLANTA—As coronavirus cases have continued to rise in the U.S. throughout the summer, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention...
Archeologists discover first probable coronavirus victim
ATLANTA—Archeologists working in coordination with the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) have discovered the first probably coronavirus victim...
Dozens of cardboard sports fans have died from COVID-19 already
TORONTO—Dozens of fake cardboard and mannequin sports fans have died from COVID-19 since being used to make sports look somewhat...
Fauci to lead new COVID Inquisition Panel
The United States Supreme Court today has ordained that any mention of the malaria cure known as Hydroxychloroquine curing someone...
COVID-19 down in Sweden thanks to invisible face masks
STOCKHOLM—The nation of Sweden has embarked on a very different response to the COVID-19 pandemic. Many other nations have taken...
